Drama, Drama, Drama

Sundays used to be a great day for Monte & I, pre-kids. We lived out in Surrey and chose to attend church in White Rock, at Peace Portal Alliance. They would offer the same morning service in the evening on Sundays, and so we enjoyed sleeping in and took the day at whatever pace we wanted until 6pm when the service started. We should have enjoyed more the "leisurely-ness" of those weekends... Of those laid-back Sundays that went according to our plan, to our schedule and we did what we felt like whenever we felt like it.

Sundays these days around our house are nothing but drama. Nate's copping an attitude that's difficult to deal with, especially when we're trying so hard to get out the door on time. He suddenly decides he doesn't want to go to church, and completely shuts down. He won't go to church, and therefore he won't go to the bathroom before we go. He fights the kids' church sign-in when we get there, and outright refuses to enter the room where a dozen other preschoolers are playing with toys (how dare us, evil parents, subject our son to such fun and play!). And then occasionally Cody concludes that the nursery is not the ideal place to spend an hour and a half, and so whenever I'm not trying to coerce Nate into kids' church I'm consoling Cody, attempting to calm him down enough to leave him under someone else's care so I can get in just a few minutes of grown-up time in the service. It makes me wonder if Sundays are even worth the effort right now. You know, when you're yelling at your little one to hurry up and get ready to go worship the Lord? Or sitting outside on the church curb with him during an extra long time-out? Sometimes I feel like I'm just relocating my work from home to church; it's frustrating to not get that break that I tend to expect out of Sunday church. However, being a parent has taught me that expectations are cause for disappointment, and my experiences as a mother are much more gratifying when I look for the joy in the circumstances. Now I just need to figure out how to do that... with grace.

My Angry List

I'm the queen of to-do lists. I usually have two or three going at a time. Monte often makes fun of me and my lists. The thing about a to-do list is that during times in my life when I just don't have time to get it all done, the to-do list helps me prioritize. I get overwhelmed by the endless tasks that need to be done and jotting them down on a notepad makes me feel like I've got it under control. Today, however, my to-do list turned into my angry list. I no longer felt satisfied by gathering my weekly tasks with a pen and paper; this time I needed to write down the unfinished tasks that made me feel mad! And it was just as satisfying. From tripping over things in our cluttered garage to the forgotten leftovers rotting at the back of the fridge to the mail/papers that always seem to accumulate on the dining room table. I can't handle it anymore! Let's hope my anger will fuel a desire to see these tasks completed.

Trashed Toe

Canada Day was supposed to be a quiet day at home, just me and Cody, while Monte and Nate took his parents to the airport and spent a good part of the day out together. I was really looking forward to it; there's something so relaxing to me about enjoying my own space in peace and quiet. So I put Cody down for his morning nap, and take Bailey outside before sitting down to enjoy a fresh cup of coffee all by myself. But as Bailey and I come back into the house I can hear Cody playing with his mobile in his crib and I remembered that should he pull the entire mobile apart, a small piece holding it all together could easily find it's way into Cody's mouth and he would choke on it. So I spring into action, running up the two stairs from the living room to Cody's room down the hall. Bailey must've had the same concern, as she also ran up the stairs just under my feet and I bail, landing funny on my left foot. It hurt pretty bad, so I look down at the toe that's pulsing with pain and it's definitely curved out of it's usual shape. But sometimes the little toes get squished up on each other, so I try bending it back and immediately regret touching it at all. I've never broken a bone in my life, but I had a suspicion that that's what had just happened. Since I was home on my own with Cody, I tried to ignore it and went on with my day (after all, there's not a whole lot you can do for a broken toe, right?). Well, by the time Monte got home, the top of my foot had turned purple and the pain was hard to ignore. So I agreed to Monte's persistent advice and sought out medical attention. Mental note: Canada Day is THE day to go to a walk-in clinic or to the hospital. I was the only one at both the walk-in and in the x-ray department at the hospital. They figured it's a fracture, but my doctor won't get the results until next week. So for the next few weeks I'm hobbling around on one and a half feet with a white bandage up to my ankle. Who knew one little toe could be so high-maintenance? The real disappointment in this mishap is that we had to cancel (or at least postpone) our 7th wedding anniversary plans, since we were going to hang out in Seattle for the day and that would include a lot of walking.

Three is Tricky

I'm a few weeks into this whole taking care of another kid every day thing. It's been quite the transition! But it's really made me think about whether or not we'd consider having another baby (jury's still out on that one...). I've always considered Nate to be a very social kid and thought this would be like a really really long playdate for him - what kid wouldn't love having another one over to play every day? However, it's revealed his competitive nature and how possessive he is over his stuff. Cody on the other hand loves having around another person closer to his size. He enjoys getting in there with the kids and playing with 'big kid stuff.'

Since all our family on the Horban side is heading out of the country for summer vacation, we got together to celebrate birthdays: Megan's 28th and Cody's first! I wasn't sure what to expect with Cody tasting his first cupcake (since Nate wanted nothing to do with sugar of any kind until he was 2 years old) but one tiny taste of chocolate icing, and that cupcake was demolished within minutes!

My Best Friend... Husband, Father, Leader

Monte bought me an under-the-cabinet radio/CD player for the kitchen for Christmas, and so we have Praise 106.5 on pretty much all day. It's nice to have on in the background while I cook and it sometimes reminds me to be a little more patient and show a little more grace to my boys when we're in the middle of baby/preschooler drama! But the other day I heard a song that really resonated with me. Sanctus Real sings a song called "Lead Me" and it's a prayer of a husband/father's heart. After hearing it a few more times (Praise is not exactly known for their vast selection of songs!) and being totally affected by it, I went online to Sanctus Real's myspace page and read through the lyrics. In it I recognized pieces of Monte; I knew intimately the heartache and hope expressed through this song. It brought me to tears as I listened. What an essential and beautiful message not only for men, but for the women they're leading. I really needed a reminder to pray for Monte every day. It's an incredible responsibility and privilege to be a man, created to love and follow God throughout his entire life AND to lead his family in the same way, no matter what. As a wife who wants to follow her husband's leadership, I know the best way I can support Monte is by continually asking God to show him how to lead, and to give him the strength and courage to do what it takes as our leader.

Lead Me by Sanctus Real

Recipe Blog

Every Sunday I sit down with my notepad, recipe box and grocery store flyers to plan my meals for the week and make my grocery list, usually with a cup of coffee and a muffin in the morning before heading off to church. I love preparing my meal plans and digging out "lost" recipes from the back of my recipe box; I find it so satisfying when I can get something organized in our noisy, busy, cluttered home. But every so often I feel totally stumped and can't come up with anything worth making (or eating) for the week. From conversations with friends and reading status updates on facebook, it seems like most of us cooks feel tapped out from time to time. So I decided to start a blog where I can collect and share some of my favourite recipes, and hopefully new recipes will be shared in the comments section. Beware, I am no gourmet cook; I didn't go through in-depth training at a culinary institute like my husband. Some recipes are loved by our family because they're so simple and fun. Some recipes are healthy and low-fat, while others throw all that out the window. And everything I enjoy making can be found at a regular grocery store. If you have a favourite recipe or two, please share it! I could use some fresh ideas.

Bye Bye Baby... Hello Toddler

I was so on top of recording Nate's milestones during his first year; I'm not doing so well with Cody's. Well, he's on the move now and is a very determined little guy. He keeps me busy! He's crawling, pulling himself up, climbing stairs, even cruising around furniture a little. While I'm saddened by the thought of no longer having my little baby to snuggle with, I'm really excited to see Cody walk and interact more with Nate. Cody gets so energized by the people around him and I can tell he just wants to be included. Once he becomes a little more sturdy and mobile, he'll hopefully be less frustrated with having to just be the spectator.

Today's our first complete day on the bottle... Cody's been weaning himself over the last few months and while I tried to fight it at first, I eventually embraced the idea of bottle-feeding and slowly moved to formula. We're both happier now. I never loved nursing but knew it was best for him and my own preferences weren't a good enough reason to bottle-feed. Ten months was a pretty good run.

He's cutting his one-year molars on the bottom, making 10 teeth in total in six months. No wonder we're so sleep-deprived and cranky! He weighs 24 lbs, and is wearing 18 month clothes. He babbles a lot (and VERY loudly) but hasn't said his first word yet. Cody prefers finger foods over pureed baby food; I have to get creative with his meals, since I have a freezer full of homemade baby food. And he loves watching Mickey Mouse on TV - it's fun to watch how excited he gets when Mickey makes his appearance.