A Moment to Remember (or maybe to forget?!)

There have been many memorable moments since bringing home Cody, and figuring out how to be a family of four. Today held one of these moments. Cody has been extremely fussy this past week; we've been experiencing some struggles with him, and haven't had much success in fixing the problems. I started the day off with a horrible night's sleep and was therefore very very tired (more so than the last 8 weeks of sleep deprivation). Cody was fussy all morning and nothing I did stopped him from crying. Nate, as a typical 2 yr old, followed me around asking question after question, and constantly seeked my attention. By the time we finished lunch, the tears I had been holding in all morning couldn't be held in any longer, and Cody and I both just sobbed on the couch. Nate, being the sweetheart that he is, decided to bring me a glass of water I had just poured in the kitchen, to lift my spirits. The glass was totally full, and so water splashed all over the sides of the glass onto the carpet. Nate stopped after realizing he had spilled all my water, looked at me and burst into tears. He put down the glass and I coaxed him over to the couch to console him, since he was clearly upset that his attempt to cheer me up instead created a big mess. So all three of us sat on the couch and had a good cry. And then we were able to get up and move on with our day! Crying with my kids for no specific reason was certainly a low point, and one that made me feel like a failure as a mother. But I also know how much I love my boys and that sometimes life overwhelms you and the only thing you can do is react. I don't want to make a habit of breaking down in front of my kids, but maybe an occasional cry won't do any permanent emotional damage?! This memory will stick with me, I'm sure, as one day I'll look back on the disaster days we had and somehow still survived!

Mommy's Helper

Big Smiles!

We were so excited this past week to see Cody's true smile for the first time! Nothing makes those sleepless nights and fussy times more worth it than seeing your little one smile back at you. My heart has melted over and over again this week, and I'm addicted to getting him to smile as much as possible. Over the last couple weeks I've been exasperated (to tears) with nursing Cody, and so I'm very grateful for the reward of his smile.

Last night we hosted the Horban clan for our annual peach pie indulgence. My mom brought over two large pies, and we polished one off entirely, and ate half of the second. Monte being the peach pie lover accounted for at least one third of the eaten pie! It was so great to finally be able to host our entire family in our home and Nate was ecstatic (an understatement) to have Avri, Danae and Marea over to play in his playroom.

The Big 3-0!

Monte had his 30th birthday this past Sunday, and we had several occasions to celebrate this major event! We first got together with the Baerg family while Sylvia, Andy and the girls were out visiting. We enjoyed a waffle feast and then sat around in a sugar coma while the kids bounced off the walls! Then we had a dinner of nachos and other appetizers at the Horban house, with make-your-own sundaes for dessert (this is the perk of your birthday - my mom makes whatever the birthday person requests for the meal). And then on Saturday we had a few friends over for a bbq. Of course I either forgot to bring my camera to these dinners, or I had it with me but forgot to take pictures, so here are the very few I did manage to take... Nate sampling the chocolate whip cream off the beaters for the cake, and Jarris holding Cody - somehow Monte was not included in his own birthday pictures!

Thoroughly Exhausted!

The first couple weeks home with Cody were fairly easy. Monte stayed home from work for over a week, and Cody mainly slept and ate... And did well with both of those activities. But I was warned by a friend that usually by the third week the euphoria of having a newborn baby wears off. I’m amazed at how much I’ve forgotten from when Nate was this little; I wish I had documented more of the details of what I went through with Nate, through each phase since they change so much so fast. What my friend had said was true... by middle of week three, we were all exhausted and were very aware of just how little sleep we were getting, how little time we all had for each other, and how much we wanted a little time and space to ourselves. Cody went from sleeping 4 or 5 hours straight at night, to regularly feeding every 2 to 3 hours no matter what the hour. He’s also established a fussy time, around 8pm – just when Nate’s gone to sleep and I’m looking forward to having a little down time for myself!

What I struggle with most in learning how to be a mom of two kids is how to balance my time for both boys. I don’t have much one-on-one time with Nate anymore, and what time I do have for him is often spent disciplining him. So today I made a point of putting Cody to sleep in his room instead of in the bouncy chair that is moved to whatever room we’re in at the time, and take 15 minutes to read books with Nathan, giving my undivided attention. I was amazed at how just a little “mommy time” brought out the affectionate, sweet little boy I had known before Cody was born. We had been very diligent to ensure Nate got one-on-one attention with having a baby around, but it was usually with Monte. While that’s still so important, I realize Nate misses having alone time with me as well and I missed it too. It didn’t take much, but I could tell it meant the world to Nate and so I’m going to be more deliberate in taking time out to spend just with Nathan.

A Note from Mom

I've decided to change the title of our blog to include Cody, and we'll use this as a way to update friends and family on our entire family instead of just Nate as we've been doing so far.

We've been a family of four for almost two weeks now, and we're feeling fairly settled into regular life again. Nate's been a super big brother, giving Cody lots of hugs and kisses and being extremely gentle and caring towards his little brother. Nate calls him "little dude" and tells Cody not to worry and strokes his head when he starts to cry. Nathan's listening abilities have taken a hit since we brought home Cody - thus, a few more time-outs each day - but we have little to complain about. He's doing great with all the changes.

Cody was a marathon eater for the first few nights home, wanting to feed for 3 or 4 hours straight in the middle of the night. He seems to have caught up with his hunger and has now been sleeping great at night! We go to sleep around 11pm/midnight, and I have to wake him at 5 or 6am to eat again. A far cry from my experience with Nate as a newborn; I'm thankful for the sleep each night! We heard that often the second is completely opposite from the firstborn, and we've discovered this to be true with regards to Cody's digestive system. He's spit up only once so far and I'm enjoying not having to change my clothes after each feeding! Nate was a puker... We never left the house without several extra items of clothing to change into.

We've been spoiled with meals brought over by friends and family, as well as gifts and just time spent with us, and getting to know Cody. We feel so privileged to have such special people in our lives! This has especially allowed us to enjoy time together as a family, and not feel so overwhelmed with the day-to-day tasks that need to get done. Our home is a disaster, but it's not a priority and we know that our boys will only be this little for a short time. We have had a few moments of "what have we gotten ourselves into?!" when both boys are melting down and we're too worn out to effectively deal with it, but for the most part being a family of four is better than we could ever have expected.

Big Changes

Life at the Baerg house has changed in many ways since I last blogged. We moved from our townhouse to a house at the end of June. I LOOOOVE having so much more space to run around! I even have my own playroom in the basement where I can make as big a mess as I want! It's so great. And I've been enjoying having a backyard and even a playground just beyond that.

The other huge change in our lives is my little baby brother who arrived a few days ago, on July 13th! Cody Michael (Michael named after my great grandpa who I only met once; he passed away last July). He was born after a very long wait at the hospital, weighing in at 7 lbs just like me, and almost 2 feet tall! I love my baby brother. When my parents brought him home from the hospital, I couldn't wait to show him his room, and just sit and look at him, stroking his cheek and singing my favourite songs to him. I even got to hold him a few times already. I'm going to teach him so many fun things! While Cody was on his way and my parents were at the hospital, I got to spend lots of special time with my grandpa and grandma Baerg, and my grandma Horban came over for a sleepover two nights in a row! What a great time I had, just me and my grandparents! I'm glad my mom and dad are home, though, and we're getting used to being a family of four now... Sleep deprivation and all! I've especially loved having my dad around all the time, since he took over a week off of work. He and I have done a lot of special things together since Cody arrived, and I've loved every minute of it!